{"id":2292,"date":"2025-04-17T21:47:00","date_gmt":"2025-04-17T21:47:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/?p=2292"},"modified":"2025-04-17T22:48:14","modified_gmt":"2025-04-17T22:48:14","slug":"geride-kalanlarin-makus-talihi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/geride-kalanlarin-makus-talihi\/","title":{"rendered":"Geride kalanlar\u0131n makus talihi"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\"\"\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t

Geride kalanlar\u0131n makus talihi<\/h2>

\u0130nsanl\u0131k tarihinin en gizemli konusu nedir diye sorsalar, san\u0131r\u0131m \u00f6l\u00fcm ilk \u00fc\u00e7te yer al\u0131r. Hadi do\u011fumu bir \u015fekilde etrafl\u0131ca ara\u015ft\u0131rabiliyor, detaylar\u0131yla tan\u0131yoruz, do\u011fumdan sonras\u0131n\u0131 yani canl\u0131 olma haline de gayet iyi vak\u0131f\u0131z, ancak ya\u015fam d\u00f6ng\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fcn son dura\u011f\u0131 olan \u00f6l\u00fcm s\u0131r perdesini g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde dahi koruyor. O son nefesten sonras\u0131n\u0131 ya\u015farken kestiremiyoruz, inanc\u0131m\u0131za veya bilimsel teorilerimize g\u00f6re akl\u0131m\u0131zda bir senaryo var ama filmin sonu senaryoya ne kadar uyacak, i\u015fte ondan emin olam\u0131yoruz. Gidenin ard\u0131ndan \u201eBir \u00e7ok gidenin her biri memnun ki yerinden, Bir \u00e7ok seneler ge\u00e7ti; d\u00f6nen yok seferinden\u201d dizelerini yazan Yahya Kemal Beyatl\u0131 gibi baz\u0131 tahminlerde bulunabiliriz \u00f6l\u00fcm hakk\u0131nda en fazla, hepsi bu.<\/p>

Peki geride kalanlar hakk\u0131nda ne biliyoruz? Zaman her ac\u0131y\u0131 dindirir derler, bu do\u011fru mu? Sevdiklerini kaybedenler bilirler, \u00f6l\u00fcme \u015fahitlik edince m\u00fcthi\u015f bir \u00e7aresizlikle kar\u015f\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131ya kal\u0131r insan. Art\u0131k d\u00fcnyevi hayatta bir araya gelme imk\u00e2n\u0131 yoktur, onu g\u00f6rmek, sesini duymak, onunla konu\u015fmak, ona dokunmak, onun s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hissetmek, kokusunu almak art\u0131k m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fildir. Hele arkada birde k\u0131rg\u0131nl\u0131klar, kalp a\u011fr\u0131lar\u0131, k\u00fcsk\u00fcnl\u00fck, s\u00f6ylenmemi\u015f s\u00f6zler, yerine getirilmemi\u015f vaatler, hayal k\u0131r\u0131kl\u0131klar\u0131, ertelenmi\u015f, ya\u015fanmam\u0131\u015f hayatlar arma\u011fan kald\u0131ysa, geride kalan\u0131n ac\u0131s\u0131 daha da a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131r. Denk geldi\u011fim baz\u0131 cenazelerde ac\u0131l\u0131 insanlar\u0131n dizlerini d\u00f6vd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcne, a\u011f\u0131tlar yakt\u0131klar\u0131na ve de g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcslerine vurduklar\u0131na bir \u00e7ok kez \u015fahit oldum. Ben amcam\u0131 kaybetti\u011fimde hemen a\u011flayamam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m, nefes almak bile \u00e7ok zor gelmi\u015fti, sonra ani bir refleksle g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcs kafesime h\u0131zl\u0131 h\u0131zl\u0131 vurmaya ba\u015flay\u0131nca ancak \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fclebilmi\u015ftim. T\u00fcm bu davran\u0131\u015flar asl\u0131nda geride kalan\u0131n hayatta kalabilmesi, ac\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131nda ezilmemesi i\u00e7in geli\u015ftirdi\u011fi i\u00e7g\u00fcd\u00fcsel taktiklerdir. Terapi seanslar\u0131nda dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131 \u015fimdiye d\u00f6nd\u00fcrmek, dikkatini anda olana \u00e7ekmek i\u00e7in \u00fcst bacaklar\u0131na vurmas\u0131n\u0131 isteriz, g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcs kafesinin \u00fcst\u00fcnde yer alan tim\u00fcs bezine vurarak aktive etmek, sinir sistemimizi sakinle\u015ftirmeyi ve ferahlanmay\u0131 sa\u011flar, dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131 o s\u0131rada odada olmayan biri ile konu\u015fturmak, ona i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7enleri s\u00f6ylemeye davet etmek sevilen bir terapi metodudur. Yani asl\u0131nda geride kalanlar\u0131n ac\u0131y\u0131 dizginlemek i\u00e7in g\u00f6sterdikleri i\u00e7g\u00fcd\u00fcsel davran\u0131\u015flar bilimsel olarakta ge\u00e7erlili\u011fi ispatlanm\u0131\u015f ba\u015far\u0131l\u0131 y\u00f6ntemlerdir. Cenazelerde helalle\u015fmek, dua etmek, helva kavurmak, ikramda bulunmak; t\u00fcm bu rit\u00fceller asl\u0131nda biraz da geride kalanlar\u0131n son g\u00f6revlerini yerine getirme tela\u015f\u0131 da de\u011fil midir? Sanki gidenin ard\u0131ndan g\u00f6n\u00fcl rahatl\u0131\u011f\u0131 ile hayata devam edebilmenin bir nevi \u00f6n \u015fart\u0131?<\/p>

Geride kalan\u0131n o i\u00e7ine d\u00fc\u015fen ate\u015fi s\u00f6nd\u00fcrebilmesinin yeg\u00e2ne yolu asl\u0131nda yas tutmakt\u0131r. Hernekadar g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde mutsuz olmaya, ac\u0131 \u00e7ekmeye, yaralar\u0131 sar\u0131p aya\u011fa kalkmaya \u00e7ok fazla zaman\u0131m\u0131z ve taham\u00fcl\u00fcm\u00fcz olmasa da, geride kalman\u0131n makus talihini ancak yas tutarak yenebilir, sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 bir \u015fekide yolumuza devam edebiliriz. Yas s\u00fcrecinde ilk \u00f6nce ink\u00e2r gelir; ac\u0131 hen\u00fcz \u00e7ok taze ve dayan\u0131lmazd\u0131r, kayb\u0131n\u0131 kabullenemez ink\u00e2r eder insan, \u015foka girmi\u015ftir bir nevi. Daha sonra \u00f6fke d\u00f6nemi ba\u015flar, ba\u015f\u0131na gelenlere k\u0131zmak, sitem etmek, kadere isyan etmek, ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 haketmedi\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcp sinirlenmek bu \u00f6fke d\u00f6neminin me\u015fhur tepkileridir. \u00d6fkeden sonra pazarl\u0131k evresi ba\u015flar: bana en dokunan evredir pazarl\u0131k evresi, yas tutan ki\u015fi gidenin art\u0131k d\u00f6nmeyece\u011fini kabule ge\u00e7meye ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 halde i\u00e7ten i\u00e7e halen onu geri getirmenin yollar\u0131n\u0131 arar. Ve sondan bir \u00f6nceki evre ba\u015flar, depresyon d\u00f6nemi. Dibe vurmak, art\u0131k geri gelmeyece\u011fini ac\u0131 i\u00e7inde anlamak, \u00e7aresiz bir \u015fekilde k\u0131vranmak, a\u011flamak, insanlardan uzakla\u015fmak, susmak gibi tepkiler depresif evreye aittir. Ve en nihayetinde kabul d\u00f6nemine gireriz, ac\u0131 art\u0131k ince bir s\u0131z\u0131ya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcr, art\u0131k s\u00fcrekli can\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 yakm\u0131yordur, sadece g\u00f6zlerimizin kenar\u0131nda bir damla ya\u015f hep haz\u0131r bekler. Kaybetmi\u015f olman\u0131n getirdi\u011fi t\u00fcm \u00fcz\u00fcc\u00fc duygular hakk\u0131yla ya\u015fanm\u0131\u015f, giden ile bar\u0131\u015f\u0131lm\u0131\u015f ve art\u0131k sayfay\u0131 \u00e7evirmenin vakti gelmi\u015ftir. Art\u0131k b\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f\u00fczd\u00fcr ve gelecekle ilgili planlar yapmaya haz\u0131r\u0131zd\u0131r. Yas d\u00f6neminden ge\u00e7mek hem cesaret hem de zaman ister… Kayb\u0131n\u0131n ard\u0131ndan hakk\u0131yla yas tutmayan veya tutamayan insanlar ge\u00e7mi\u015ften bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc kopamaz, ac\u0131y\u0131 kenara koyup yeni bir sayfa a\u00e7amazlar. Kocaman bedenlerde k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcc\u00fck \u00e7ocuk kal\u0131p, s\u00fcrekli yaralar\u0131n\u0131 kanatmaya devam eder, ayn\u0131 ac\u0131lar\u0131 farkl\u0131 insanlarla tekrar tekrar ya\u015farlar.<\/p>

Nisan 2025 \/ G\u00fclsen ADALI<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Geride kalanlar\u0131n makus talihi \u0130nsanl\u0131k tarihinin en gizemli konusu nedir diye sorsalar, san\u0131r\u0131m \u00f6l\u00fcm ilk \u00fc\u00e7te yer al\u0131r. Hadi do\u011fumu bir \u015fekilde etrafl\u0131ca ara\u015ft\u0131rabiliyor, detaylar\u0131yla tan\u0131yoruz, do\u011fumdan sonras\u0131n\u0131 yani canl\u0131 olma haline de gayet iyi vak\u0131f\u0131z, ancak ya\u015fam d\u00f6ng\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fcn son dura\u011f\u0131 olan \u00f6l\u00fcm s\u0131r perdesini g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde dahi koruyor. O son nefesten sonras\u0131n\u0131 ya\u015farken kestiremiyoruz, inanc\u0131m\u0131za […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2125,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2292","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-tuerkce"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2292","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2292"}],"version-history":[{"count":43,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2292\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2336,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2292\/revisions\/2336"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2125"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2292"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2292"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guelsenadali.de\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2292"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}